Introducing Felix

I have been very fortunate in life both professionally and personally. I have had untold number of opportunities to work with inspiring people, on great projects as an actress, and I have had a fantastic long term relationship of nearly 20 years with my now husband, Max.

The one true hurdle I've faced in life is that I have a broken belly. After years of trying to get pregnant, exploring the range of fertility treatments, all unsuccessful, our journey led us to gestational surrogacy: we make a "baby cake" and bake it in another woman's "oven".

From that came two miracles. The first was meeting our carrier and her husband who were truly humbling in their decency and generosity. And the second miracle was the birth of our baby boy, Felix Handelman. Felix means "happy" and "lucky" in Latin. And true to his name, Felix is a very happy baby and a blessing on our life.

We have maintained a great deal of privacy throughout this process, and hope to continue to honor Felix's privacy going forward.

Thanks to all our friends, family, and fans for your support.

If you need me, I'll be changing dirty diapers and trying to get some sleep.

Cat + Email Chain = Hilarity

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.15am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Poster

Hi

I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me. It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.

This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.

Thanks, Shan

From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

That is shocking news.

Luckily I was sitting down when I read your email and not half way up a ladder or tree. How are you holding up?

I am surprised you managed to attend work at all what with thinking about Missy out there cold, frightened and alone... possibly lying on the side of the road, her back legs squashed by a vehicle, calling out "Shannon, where are you?"

Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Poster

yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.

From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

I never said I don't like cats.

Once, having been invited to a party, I went clothes shopping beforehand and bought a pair of expensive G-Star boots. They were two sizes too small but I wanted them so badly I figured I could just wear them without socks and cut my toenails very short.

As the party was only a few blocks from my place, I decided to walk. After the first block, I lost all feeling in my feet.

Arriving at the party, I stumbled into a guy named Steven, spilling Malibu & coke onto his white Wham 'Choose Life' t-shirt, and he punched me.

An hour or so after the incident, Steven sat down in a chair already occupied by a cat. The surprised cat clawed and snarled causing Steven to leap out of the chair, slip on a rug and strike his forehead onto the corner of a speaker; resulting in a two inch open gash. In its shock, the cat also defecated, leaving Steven with a foul stain down the back of his beige cargo pants.

I liked that cat.

Poster as requested.

Regards, David

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?

From: David Thorne

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am

To: Shannon Walkley

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

It's a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny. Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please.

Thanks.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,

Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism

I don't come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I am willing to overlook this faux pas due to you no doubt being preoccupied with thoughts of Missy attempting to make her way home across busy intersections or being trapped in a drain as it slowly fills with water. I spent three days down a well once but that was just for fun.

I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.

Regards, David

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it? I just want it to say Lost.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name Not like a movie poster or anything stupid. I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you. Thanks.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Awww

Dear Shannon,

I don't have a cat.

I once agreed to look after a friend's cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter, I kept the cat in a closed cardboard box in the shed and forgot about it.

If I wanted to feed something and clean faeces, I wouldn't have put my mother in that home after her stroke.

A week later, when my friend came to collect his cat, I pretended that I was not home and mailed the box to him. Apparently I failed to put enough stamps on the package and he had to collect it from the post office and pay eighteen dollars. He still goes on about that sometimes, people need to learn to let go.

I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.

Regards, David

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Awww

Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Awww

I know, but that one is cute.

As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this. If anybody calls and says "I haven't seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?" you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.

I knew someone who had a basset hound that had its hind legs removed after an accident and it had to walk around with one of those little buggies with wheels. If it had been my dog I would have asked for all its legs to be removed and replaced with wheels and had a remote control installed. I could charge neighbourhood kids for rides and enter it in races. If I did the same with a horse I could drive it to work.

I would call it Steven.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Please just use the photo I gave you.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? I have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.


From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley

Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm

To: David Thorne

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Fine. That will have to do.

NEW YORK/ESQUIRE magazine articles

http://nymag.com/news/features/62379/?imw=Y&f=most-viewed-24h10

http://www.esquire.com/features/abortion-doctor-warren-hern-0909?click=main_sr

RE: NEW YORK's "The Abortion Distortion" by Jennifer Senior &

ESQUIRE's "The Last Abortion Doctor" by John H. Richardson

These two articles, taken together, add much to the debate over reproductive rights in America today. The authors both had access to clinics in Midwestern cities and saw firsthand the need for access to reliable doctors, clinics and most importantly, information about family planning.

Whatever your thoughts on reproductive rights, MORE information, education and access to family planning services will REDUCE the number of abortions performed each year and that should be the goal of both sides in this debate. Please encourage funding to these clinics so that they may continue to service the needs of American women.

WRITE YOUR CONGRESSPEOPLE!!

Feel free to copy & paste:

Dear Senator Feinstein:

Please don't eliminate legal family planning procedures such as abortion from a federally-funded healthcare plan.

This will force lower- and middle-income women to use extreme measures to end unwanted pregnancies, endangering more lives. This also creates two classes of women: those who can afford legal abortions no matter their insurance and those who cannot. This is a dangerous proposition for our country.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth Banks

New Role, New hair

Some before and after pics - I'm a brunette again!

I'll be playing a convicted murderess opposite Russell Crowe in Paul Haggis's new film. He did "Crash". Psyched to be back in Pittsburgh where we shot Zach & Miri Make a Porno. Thanks Rain, for coming down to welcome me, remind me just where I'm at and which season I'm entering. Just so I won't be confused with my home in LA where it's sunny and 90 degrees.

The G20 is here this week and there is a military-like staging area just behind where I'm staying. There's cops everywhere. Riot gear. Let's hope for a peace-filled week.

Thanks to the Allegheny County Jail staff for allowing me an all-access tour of their facility today. They have an immaculate, well-run institution. It was fascinating. And thanks to the inmates with whom I spoke so candidly. I wish them well, whatever brought them to that place. They were watching a Cuba Gooding Jr. movie when I came in but nobody minded when we paused it.

Note in the brunette pic - no make-up!

Pics by Matthias Vriens

It was a photo shoot all about Max Mara coats, which, as you can see, are sublime.

Gotta get back to work - shooting The Details in Seattle with Tobey Maguire, Laura Linney and Dennis Haysbert.

New pics

This is one of the coolest pics ever taken of me - thanks Matthias Vriens, photog and Max Mara. This is running in Italy.

Italy, where I would like to be right now. Haven't been since 03. Highly recommend.

TACO TIME from SNL makes me laugh

B&W "Getting Ready" pic

You can just make out some yachts in the background of this Cannes pic. 

It looks like I'm naked or in a towel in this photo but don't get excited because, in fact, I'm wearing a robe. I had to pull it down so the stylist could curl the back of my hair which he is doing in this photo as I ponder the economic crisis and whether those yachts are in bad taste. 

I decided it was "all cool." 

Cannes photos..

It's Cannes! 

That's the Croisette and the bay as seen from our hotel room at the Martinez. 

It's sorta like Santa Monica if Santa Monica was the South of France, you know? 

This is the first day of the festival when there's nobody in town. By the following day, there were swarms of people everywhere and cars lined up on the Croisette barely moving. 

I know Cannes is old news already but I'm just getting my pics uploaded after a weekend drinking margaritas in honor of the vets. 

CANNES

I just got back from the Festival de Cannes (as they call it) and a few days of hanging in Paris. It was pretty good. 

I had my man with me, we went on a yacht, ate cheese, drank Negroni's. Not all in one night. 

We saw UP in 3-D (adorable) and Precious (the opposite of adorable, but great). So I guess it was better than good. 

I'll post some personal pics soon. 

For the budding fashionistas out there: red Armani Prive and silver Zac Posen. 

The closest I've felt to "I've Made It"

Being a clue in People's crossword! 

It's not the NYT but I'll take it. 

Women In Film's giving me an award!

Cool company, right? 

I'm not sure what Face of the Future means, but it's a little sci-fi, a little naughty and a tad preposterous. 

17 AGAIN - A REVIEW

I went to see 17 AGAIN this past weekend. Not because I have an 11-year-old daughter. Not because I am an HSM fan - never seen it! No, I plunked down my soft-earned money for this flick for one reason: I am a 3?-year-old woman inappropriately lustful of Zac Efron (Ya got me, media, especially you, GQ!). 

First, a disclaimer: I really enjoyed this movie and everybody's performances in it (I do like working in this town). Zac Efron did not disappoint. He's charming, makes use of many fingers while "twirling a basketball" (you get it) and looks great with his shirt off (some term that "star power"). 

Here's the thing though - the message of the movie seemed to be (and again, I may just be reading too much into the twirling fingers thing): knocking up your high school sweetheart is A-OK! Especially if you give up that Syracuse scholarship to marry her! F College! 

Now, I am all for taking responsibility. I am. Which is why I wish this flick had dealt more directly with this little situation that served as the jumping off point for a PG-13 movie (attended by lots of kids not yet in the double digits). It tries to make up for it with a scene in which Margaret Cho tells us that "abstinence is best but let's get real: just use condoms when you're screwing around with each other." Now, that statement at least gets close to something: if you're gonna have sex, be safe.  (Question: Why didn't Hunter Parrish also take his shirt off in this flick?)

Unfortunately, this scene would have had a lot more impact if Zac Efron's character not only acknowledged that sex can lead to babies but also that having a kid when you're 18 is hard, hard, hard. (Spoiler alert: he should know, see, cuz that's what got him into this crazy mess!) Also, he doesn't want his daughter (again, born when he was 18) to have sex with her high-school sweetheart yet his most powerful argument against it - HAVING A KID WHEN YOU ARE JUST GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL IS HARD - I KNOW, I'M REALLY YOUR DAD! - never comes up. He's just like, "fingers crossed!" Now, of course, the daughter does not have sex (totally unrealistically) and ends up lusting after Mr. Efron (totally realistically, who wouldn't) and it's creepy and weird. 

My point here (sorry, I was looking up "image Hunter Parrish" on Google and got off-track) is that this movie kinda glamorizes teenage parenting. It basically says: Go for it! Have a kid when you're 18. Throw another one in for good measure right after and you'll get a nice house, deck and hammock included, your baby mama apparently won't need to work, your kids will eventually have ipods and get into Georgetown and the person you picked (when you were 17) IS actually your soulmate! Don't worry if the condom breaks - it's cool! It's totally worked out for Bristol, ya'll! (Is it me or is Levi cute?)

The problem with this message is that, according to unreliable online sources and my own anecdotal evidence collected over my 3? odd years: this is crap. It's a great Hollywood story (I really enjoyed this movie, did I say that?) but in reality, teenage parents (mothers, especially) face increased levels of poverty, lower education rates, and higher chances that their daughters will also end up teenage moms and their sons will end up in jail. (I would like to see Zac Efron and Hunter Parrish fight Channing Tatum in a jail flick). 

An interesting thing about the movie is that there's a message buried in it - there's a fun thread of social satire pointing out that kids today obviously live in an overly-sexualized world that glamorizes the act so much, they practically have no choice but to bang each other (one cheerleading sequence took me back, the other disturbed me). But the satire was above the pay-grade of the 8-year-old sitting behind me. I'm pretty sure he/she (what's with all the long hair?) saw the movie like this: out-of-wedlock teenage pregnancy leads to falling off a bridge into a magic tornado, inappropriate dancing between a MILF and the star of HSM,  buying cool Ray Bans with your rich friend's Black Amex, winning back the girl and, finally, running through a magic tunnel that makes your clothes suddenly fit you even though you just instantly gained 40 pounds. 

Now suspension of disbelief is no problem. Seriously, this film is a fun ride. I just wish the flick had EXPLICITLY mentioned, just mentioned, that it might NOT be cool to have a kid when you're 18 SO for G-D's sake, use birth control! Matthew Perry admits to Leslie Mann he's been in a bad mood for 20 years. Well, having a kid when you're still one yourself might do that to you! Say it out loud. For the sake of the 8-year-olds. 

25 Funniest Women in Hollywood - EW.com

Thanks EW! Better than a marshmallow peep this holiday weekend! 

LUCKY in MAY!

I almost wrote, "I'm a cover girl" but then panicked that the L'oreal people might get annoyed ..... but anyways, I'm on the May cover of LUCKY magazine and I am feeling pretty lucky that it turned out as fresh as it did since I shot this sucker the day after the Oscars (I was what the docs refer to as "crapulent" about 8 hours prior to arrival - it's real, look it up). 

So thank you to Stewart Shining (photog) and the hair and make-up crew and coffee for making this possible. Also thank you to the folds in the yellow dress for making my boobs look big(ger than reality). 

And they let me keep those earrings! Which is pretty hot (note I am wearing them in the Vegas pics too). 

Buy the mag (to make me seem cool so I can be on other covers and also if you wanna see the inside pics)!

Vegas

To hangover or not to hangover, that was the question I pondered as I celebrated a belated b-day with my ladies in Vegas last Friday. Answer: hangover. Thank DOG for a late flight out. 

The cake was very pretty but I never saw it again after these hot chicks (note cleavage) sang the bday song, which was too bad because when I finally went up to my room, I would've loved something to nosh on. That's Yiddish for eat. 

TWITTER - it's really me NOW

Here's the thing: you should not impersonate somebody online or anywhere else for that matter, famous or not. You should not pretend to be me, for example. On Twitter, specifically. 

You will get found out. Like when you "twittered" that I was doing "A". But David Wain (director of Role Models out on DVD March 10!) was sitting at my house and knew for a fact that I was doing "B." So when he got "my" twitter, he replied to you. And then you felt terrible and now we are all good because you gave me back my identity. So that's something. 

I appreciate that you are a fan. But seriously? 

I appreciate the apology. I will now Twitter as ME! And you can follow along if you like. 

Oscar Night Fart Paws

It's over! Awards season, that is. I went to some parties and made some serious faux paux. That's fancy French for "public f-k ups." Like did you know that Brits don't really like Sting that much? The cool Brits anyway. Not sure why. But I will never talk about liking Sting with British people ever again. I mean, if they bring it up first, then fine. Otherwise, my lips are sealed. Because it was total foot-in-mouth. 

I also asked one famous person how their spouse was. Being nice. Like one does. The answer: we're divorcing. Fun times. 

Ryan Phillippe is cool. He's talented and handsome. He's always nice to me. He made the ultra-suave move of shaking my hand across a table: "It's been a long time," he says. To which I reply some gibberish: "yeah-um-us-an-then-love-seeing-your-work-um-cool" with the kicker being that I gave him the decidedly uncool two-thumbs-up. WTF? Two thumbs up? What am I, his grandmother? His Aunt Bessie from Nova Scotia? Who does that? I'll tell you who: me. Fart paw. 

IFC/AMC Spirit Awards

Presented with my ol' friend, "Mr. Gorgeous" Bradley Cooper at the Spirit Awards. Ya'll know we go back to Wet Hot American Summer together. David Wain is actually staying at my house right now while he works on his next script and "takes some meetings." 

The Spirits were made amazing by an incredible speech from Mickey Rourke (a must-see) that made me want him to win at the Oscars tonight because whatever he ends up saying in his acceptance speech will be priceless. ABC must be shitting themselves because if the number of f-bombs he dropped yesterday is any indication, ABC will be paying a bunch a fines when he wins.